Life is so full of mixed blessings.
I was parusing my collection of photos tonight, just to see if there was anything worth blogging about. Truly, its been a summer of dichotomy: on one had, lots of activities and opportunities for adventure, on the other, lots of personal stressors that have really shadowed my memory of the past few months.
Eating well and staying true to the off-white path is always hard for me when I’m stressed, and especially when I feel insecure about things like money and relationships. This summer was a blockbuster of a stressor for both areas, so I found myself eating things that normally I can turn down, like bagels and steamers at cafe’s, and random offerings of bread and sandwiches and even a few store bought cookies passed my lips. Little signs of imbalance that I simply couldn’t put my finger on.
So tonight when I looked back upon my summer pics, one theme became obvious to me – nature has been calling to me through the photo lens and I have totally missed the boat. In every picture set amidst all the shots of family, friends or even food, there are pictures of flowers and plants, like the sunflower from a friends garden
or like this rose from the Portland Rose Garden here:
What I see in all of these pictures is a powerful reminder to myself that the best thing I can do, is simply ‘be’. Nature doesn’t try to be magnificent, it simply is. Me, on the other hand: I try so dang hard to control it all that it crumbles into my hands and falls through my fingers like the finest sand. And all that controlling leaves me nothing but tired with an upset stomach and a head full of unhealthy thoughts.
I am my most beautiful and authentic self when I can create space for life to actually happen. When I give way to the buds of opportunity that are waiting to blossom, I too, can feel like the flower that opens to the light. Funny thing, when I can connect more with nature, I want to eat more in tune with nature as well. It feels so harmonious to break bread with earth’s offerings, instead of disconnect myself even further with processed foods. They just numb me out or give me a distraction from what is real. We are just not that different from the plants around us: we need food, water, love and light. It really is quite simple…..if only I allow it to be.
Recently a friend shared a Buddhist proverb that I absolutely resonated with; The proverb is:
“To know and not do is to not know.”
The word know has roots with the word Gnosis, which means to have acquired spiritual insights, or having had acquired direct spiritual experiential knowledge of the divine.
When I don’t act, I am disconnecting from the divine, from nature…when I act, it is because I know from a place of meaning so much deeper than my bird brain can fathom…..
Thank you to nature for being my compass and pointing me back to what is true 
