Off White Living

Today there is much to be grateful for.  I’m so grateful for my job, my family, my health, friends….you get the idea.

But here’s a radical thought: I’m also really grateful for all the food struggles  that I have had and continue to have.  For those who think that I must be ‘in the clear’ when it comes to sugar obsession or that I can always, without fail, walk past a plate of warm oatmeal cookies without going into major fantasy mode (and eating some of that fantasy), please remember that I am human.  And that I started this blog on behalf of a larger than life addiction to sugar.  There is no getting around it:  In order to surrender to the white stuff, and hence leave it behind ,I must first be grateful for its existence.

I was in a Carolyn Myss workshop where we were looking at our ‘issues’ and why we had them.  We focused on a few resentments we held, a few stuck points.  At the end of this 2.5 day workshop she looked at all of us and said:

“I want you to recall the most painful thing that has ever happened to you.  And now I want you to thank that thing because it was the BEST thing that ever happened to you”……YOWZA, talk about having to do some humbling personal work.

So for me, sugar addiction is the worst/best thing that has happened to me .  It has brought me to my knees and leveled me on more than one occasion.  It has also awakened in me a passion and a gift for helping others that I never saw coming.  Who knew that I’d ever want to be on TV…..who knew that I’d actually be able to help people with this messed up love of cookies and donuts.  WHO KNEW….

So tonight I feel really grateful and part of off-white eating has nothing to do with food at all, and has everything to do with how much I feel nourished on a deeper, soul level.  I’ve only been able to touch that with my food issues and the community I’ve found here on this blog and in my life.